Our bank is insane. They've just given us another 10 thousand dollars credit. That's a lot. Now the dangerous thing about this is, that it increases the probability of us being an extra 10 thousand dollars in debt (with 0 being no chance, and 1 being every possible chance) to around 1.
The reasons behind this are not very hard to understand. If I gave you a big wad of hundred dollar bills, and put them in a pile next to your front door and said - "You can spend all of these if you want, It's probably not a great idea though, because of... blah blah trailing off into the distance some boring crap about interest and financial responsibility..."
When I came back there probably wouldn't be many bills left. Ali calls it "Shopping". I jokingly refer to it as "contributing to the impending financial crisis", but I'm just as bad.
The reasons behind my inability to manage money in a responsible, accountant-like way are somewhat more interesting, and in my head are interconnected with fungi, my Dad and Dunlop KT26 Sneakers. If you'd like to share this synaptic association, read on...
One day when I was about 14 and waiting for the school bus on the Congo Road, I plonked my brand new KT26 sneaker down onto the dirt and an enormous cloud of snot-green powder flew up into the air, soiling my shiny shoes. "Hey!" says me "What's that?" Looking down, there was a squashed piece of what used to be a mushroom left in the sexy tread mark of my shoe.
"That's a puffball!" said my Dad (Dad was teaching at Moruya High that day, and was taking the bus with me. )
"That cloud of dust was it's spores."
"So what does a puffball do exactly?" Says me again, wiping green slime off my shoes.
"Well, it doesn't do anything much. It gets stepped on, releases it's spore and that makes more puffballs."
Perhaps I was feeling particualrly reflective for a teenager, or perhaps there just wasn't an awful lot to do in Moruya, but I rode the bus to school that day thinking what a futile thing it must be to be a puffball. And then, as I ambled up the brown path to Moruya High, I got to thinking - what's so different about being a human?
We're born, we make other humans, we die. The only thing I could come up with that was different,apart from the fact that sex isn't dependant on an enormous KT26 stomping on you ( but if that happens to be what you're into, then good for you) is that bunch of stuff in the middle, that we call our lives. That largely includes a whole bunch of silly posing and carrying on about things that are so very important to us. Love and art and culture and relationships and entertainment and delight and tragedy and status and other such social oddities. Oh, and finance.
That idea kind of stuck with me all my life. It's the humans that make the rules for our world, and determine our "success" or "failure". But realistically, as long as we make other humans, we're successful. At least as successful as a puffball, and they're stilll here after who knows how long...
So, I guess that puffball attitude lies latent in most of my decisions, but really comes out in decisions that bore me. And man that financial management thing bores me. But getting new stuff is fun.
Hey, maybe my bank isn't insane at all. Maybe they wish everybody else was as crazy as me...
Maybe one day I'll be listed on the alumni section at Moruya High...Mind you, I've never heard of any of those guys...
Hey Gordy! Could you convert that 10 grand to 100 dollar bills and leave it on my desk? I've got a few pressing bills need paying and my bank hasn't been so magnanimous lately..
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